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| Displaying Witty Replies Anecdotes: 1208 Found |
Par For the Course
A young actress was once invited by Ethel Barrymore to dinner - and not only fai...
George Jessel: Dog Day Afte...
George Jessel was a longtime member of the comedians' Round Table at the exclusi...
Stork Outwitted
One day, George Jessel arrived at the exclusive Stork Club with the very beautif...
Turnaround Reply
Many novelists, seduced by the lure of Hollywood, have come to regret the decisi...
Passing Advice
While serving as the BBC's adviser on Roman Catholic affairs, Father Andrew Agne...
Niels Bohr: Horse Sense?
One day a visitor to Niels Bohr's country cottage noticed a horseshoe hanging on...
Henry Ward Beecher: Fool's ...
Arriving at Plymouth church one Sunday, Henry Ward Beecher found in his mail a c...
Fighting Words!
During the Civil War, Henry Ward Beecher traveled to England in order to solicit...
Obstruction of Justice
After hosting a supper for several distinguished guests one evening, Sophie Arno...
Laborious Day
One night, when the director of Peter Pan dismissed the cast after a long...
Hearst Denied
James Bennett, no fan of rival publisher William Randolph Hearst, was one day ir...
Fire in the Louvre!
Tristan Bernard once won a newspaper competition by providing the best answer to...
Exceptional Soldiers?
William Pitt was once visited in London by several volunteers offering their ser...
Singed Photo
While appearing on "The Goon Show," Peter Sellers received a curious letter from...
Silent Cal
One evening Calvin Coolidge was sitting at dinner when a fellow guest - well awa...
Christian Herter: Church Ba...
"When Christian Herter was governor of Massachusetts, he was running hard for a ...
Punctuated Equilibrium?
In 1802, Timothy Dexter published a twenty-four page pamphlet (entitled "A Pickl...
Winning Argument?
One day in 1917, the noted playwright Ben Hecht faced off against Maxwell Bodenh...
Albert Einstein: Nuclear Re...
Albert Einstein was once introduced to the eighteen-month-old son of a young fri...
Ranching on the Beltway
Herbert Hoover once complained to former president Calvin Coolidge that his atte...
Smash Hit
A notoriously vain actor named Dustin Farnum once boasted to Oliver Herford that...
Liberty Bell
In 1970, Procrastinators' Club of America founder Les Waas and his fellow member...
Q & A
William Phelps, marking exam papers shortly before Christmas one year, came acro...
Out of Order
One day at the height of the Vietnam War, Lord Mountbatten agreed to appear on "...
Final Request
Shortly before his execution by firing squad, the notorious murderer James Rodge...
Punchier Paragraphs
One day Milt Sosin's editor at The News ordered the staff to write shorte...
Ignose
Albert Szent-Gyorgyi once submitted a paper describing his isolation of a new su...
Garden Party?
One day while Groucho Marx was working in his garden (dressed in well-worn garde...
Russell Crowe: Joe Job
At the age of 22, Russell Crowe moved from his native New Zealand to Sydney, Aus...
Talk Show
Eddie Fisher once appeared on a television program during which entertainers sou...
Slinky Dress
One evening late in his life, the charming former senator Chauncey Depew found h...
Busy Body
Dorothy Parker was once interrupted on her honeymoon by Harold Ross (her indomit...
Charitable Interpretation?
On a visit to New York, Harpo Marx was bombarded by requests from various charit...
Tempo
Gabriel Faure was once asked what the ideal tempo for a song should be. "If the ...
Members Only?
F. E. Smith annoyed many patrons of London's exclusive Athenaeum Club (of which ...
Jayne Mansfield: Got Milk?
The famously well-endowed Jayne Mansfield (whose studio chair on the set of ...
Bette Davis: Post-po...
Bette Davis was once informed by her attorney that rumors of her death were spre...
Sammy Davis Handicap
One day in the 1950s, Sammy Davis, Jr lost his left eye in a car crash (on his w...
Dinner Party
While attending a private dinner party one evening, Alfred Hitchcock, whose famo...
Oliver Herford: Comic Ambition
One day Oliver Herford was solemnly asked by a serious young woman whether he re...
Sarcoma?
Evelyn Waugh was no fan of Winston Churchill's obnoxious journalist son, Randolp...
Best Side
One day on the set of Alfred Hitchcock's Lifeboat (1944), Mary Anderson, ...
Feeling Better
One day during his tenure as president of the Philippine Commission, William How...
Sabrina Matthews: Lesbian Quip
"I was performing at a comedy club," Sabrina Matthews once recalled, "and when I...
George Carlin: Handicapped ...
"Recently, in a public bathroom, I used the handicapped stall," George Carlin on...
Truman Capote: Autograph Si...
"The late, much-lamented Truman Capote was in a New York restaurant on one of th...
Elaine Stritch & Noel Cowar...
During a rehearsal one day, Elaine Stritch began to sing, "When the tower of Bab...
Stony Reply
One day Samuel Johnson and his biographer James Boswell found themeselves discus...
Nasty Belloc
A wastedr once approached Hilaire Belloc - a master of the nasty putdown - and b...
Julian Calendar?
Although Julia had three sons and two daughters by Marcus Vipsanius Agrippa (her...
Pacifism
The French ambassador to Washington, Jean Jusserand, once found himself discussi...
Royal Criticism
A young poet once sent Hermann Bahr a historical tragedy, along with a request f...
Douglas Jerrold: What's Goi...
One day, Douglas Jerrold was accosted in the street by a talkative bore. "What's...
tou·ché
Two ladies once complimented Dr. Johnson on his recently published ...
Astor Overboard?
In 1929, Lady Astor won election to the British House of Commons (the first woma...
Red in the Face?
Eleanor Roosevelt once subjected Winston Churchill to a diatribe on the subject ...
Roundly Rewarded
Having emerged unscathed from a duel in a secluded corner of London, Lord Alvanl...
Dorothy Parker: Leaden Excuse
The New Yorker was launched (in 1925) by Harold Ross on a shoestring budg...
Point Well Made?
While visiting Henry Ward Beecher one day, Robert Ingersoll noticed a beautiful ...
Hog Tied?
While serving as England's Lord Chancellor, Francis Bacon once presided over a c...
Wit's Miscellany
Richard Bentley, the publisher of "Bentley's Miscellany" (a magazine in which ma...
No Canvassing?
J. M. Barrie valued his privacy and was known to react violently when it was inv...
Art Louver?
Upon his return home after a visit to Paris one year, Humphrey Davy was asked wh...
Figurative Threats
One of Thomas Hart Benton's political rivals, Mississippi Senator Henry S. Foote...
Signature Insults
At the age of twenty-two, Sarah Bernhardt persuaded Felix Duquesnel (the owner o...
Bernhardt's Leg
In 1915, during an unfortunate performance in the title role of Victorien Sardou...
Bridge Burner?
While planning a campaign one day, one of Richelieu's officers, poring over a ma...
Advanced Intellect
One day late in life Sir Malcolm Sargent was asked: "To what do you attribute yo...
Smart Move
While working as an impecunious young reporter in Virginia City, Mark Twain was ...
Escargots
Having waited an absurdly long time for a waiter to take his order in a French r...
Faith Hope & Charity
Fulton Sheen once spoke at an inter-faith rally in Baltimore. Having been welcom...
Determined Thief?
One day Zeno caught his slave stealing. Threatened with a good thrashing, he beg...
Strung Quartet?
One evening George Bernard Shaw attended a performance by an Italian string quar...
Eleonora Ruse
Eleonora Duse once enlisted Sam Davis (the editor of the Carson Appeal an...
Debasing Comment
In his late twenties, John Maynard Keynes traveled to Africa with a friend from ...
Brief Reminder
While reading the newspaper one day, Rudyard Kipling came across a curious annou...
Giving Thanks
At the height of his success, a newspaper calculated that Rudyard Kipling was ea...
1000 Words
William Randolph Hearst, always in search of sensational stories, once sent a te...
Hearty Celebration!
After they won the 1969 World Series, several members of the New York Mets "mira...
Details Downtracked
While covering the Italian invasion of Ethiopia in 1935, Evelyn Waugh received a...
Handy Books?
G. K. Chesterton was once asked what books he would most like to have with him i...
National Pride
Winston Churchill entered a men's washroom in the House of Commons one day and, ...
Skinner & Shaw
One day in 1935, Cornelia Otis Skinner, enjoying great success in the title role...
Heckler
While delivering a campaign speech one day Theodore Roosevelt was interrupted by...
Substitute Teacher?
As court poet to Archduke Cosimo III of Tuscany, Giovanni Fagiuoli was also a co...
Open Season?
While hunting one day with director Howard Hawks and William Faulkner, the accla...
W. C. Fields: Persistent Sa...
One day W. C. Fields was accosted by a very persistent insurance salesman. The m...
Unscripted Solution
John Ford once directed a film for Samuel Goldwyn and MGM. When the shooting beg...
Western Civilization
Mahatma Gandhi was once asked what he thought about Western civilization. "I thi...
La Scala
While serving as general manager of New York's Metropolitan Opera, Gatti-Casazza...
Seventh Crisis
One day Richard Nixon visited a small bookstore to sign copies of his new book, ...
Third Fleet
In October 1944, the Japanese circulated bulletins claiming that most of the shi...
Decolletage
John Doherty once attended a ball at Dublin Castle - and was shocked by the deco...
Conrad Hilton: Great Gravity
While appearing as a guest on "The Tonight Show" one evening, famed hotelier Con...
Assinine Comment?
One day Clare Boothe Luce, a Republican, was asked by a journalist for her comme...
For Whom the Bell Tolls
Robert Benchley once attended the Broadway premiere of an unfortunate play. At o...
Restless Fighter
During a match against Tony Galento one day, Joe Louis, knocked down by a surpri...
Alfred Hitchcock: Bumpy Trip?
Alfred Hitchcock was once detained at a French airport by a customs official who...
Dumb Luck
Jean Cocteau was once asked whether he believed in luck. "Of course," he replied...
Pablo Picasso: Fake Picassos
The production of forged Picassos naturally grew apace with the artist's acclaim...
Waterloo
One day Montgomery hopped into a London taxi. "Waterloo," he declared. "Station?...
Greenwood's Pencil
"In one of the great stage performances of our time Mr Paul Greenwood breathed n...
Bait And Switch?
One day Alexandre Dumas and a few of his friends found themselves discussing the...
Prioritities
Among the most difficult decisions during the production of Michael Gordon's ...
Hard Work
Clarence Darrow was once interviewed for a magazine article on prominent men and...
Conjunction
"Eddie Cantor and Georgie Jessel were on the same bill on a vaudeville unit," Jo...
Noel Coward: Motivation
During a rehearsal one day, Noel Coward was repeatedly interrupted by a young ac...
Perfectly Agreeable
One afternoon in 1911, Woodrow Wilson, then serving as New Jersey's governor, re...
Second Best?
The drama critic James Agate once approached Lilian Braithwaite at a social func...
Lackey Guess?
Despite the charlatanism inherent in his writings, John Taylor cultivated a rema...
hehehehe
Paul Taylor once contributed an unusual solo performance to a modern-dance progr...
Rosalind Russell: Timeless ...
At a luncheon party one day, a snooty young actress fixed Rosalind Russell with ...
Mad Ladie
Because her prophecies were deemed a danger during the troubled religious climat...
Hite Report
Famed sexual researcher Shere Hite was once asked how most men had had sex with ...
Ocean of Meaning
Groucho Marx was once asked by an enthusiastic friend for his opinion of the lat...
Groucho Marx: Chastity
Groucho Marx was descending in the elevator at the Hotel Danieli in Venice one d...
Hairy Situation
Groucho Marx was once stopped by the maitre d' as he entered the dining room of ...
Casablanca Lawsuit (long)
When they learned that a new Marx Brothers film was to be entitled "A Night in C...
Freudian Quip
In his capacity as a comedian on "You Bet Your Life" Groucho Marx interviewed ma...
Peter Sellers: Talking to God
Late one night, following a disappointing day wrestling with a troublesome scene...
Baignieres's Mutiny
The Parisian saloniere Euphrasie Aubernon was famed for her autocratic nature. S...
All For Nought
A man of Douglas Jerrold's acquaintance who was notorious for borrowing funds fr...
Luciano Pavarotti: Kiss of God
Luciano Pavarotti, famed for his flirtatiousness, was once interviewed on televi...
Rather Trenchant?
Dan Rather's first political run-in occurred at a Houston news conference in 197...
Facing the Music
Leonard Bernstein's father was once criticized for having failed to provide his ...
Loopy?
A lifelong agnostic, W. C. Fields was not entirely unconcerned about the possibi...
Bare Necessity?
Many visitors to Picasso's home in the south of France were astonished to find t...
Divine Wit
One day Bill Moyers, LBJ's press secretary, was called upon to say grace at lunc...
Deep Thought
In a meeting during World War I, Germany's Wilhelm II and the Netherlands' Queen...
Last Supper?
Wilson Mizner was once married to Myra Moore Yerkes, an enormously wealthy woman...
H2Woe?
Charles Spurgeon was frequently embroiled in religious controversies. "I hear yo...
Crafty Reply?
In the course of snooping through their hostess's bathroom one evening, Dorothy ...
Ball Room?
Early in his career Oliver Herford was perpetually short of money. Accordingly, ...
Immortal Reply
One evening while attending one of George Gershwin's famous parties, Groucho Mar...
Two Bits?
Andrew Carnegie was once visited by an ardent socialist who spoke at great lengt...
Minor Issue?
Jimmy Carter's Southern Baptist roots frequently led reporters to question his s...
80-20
One his eightieth birthday, Sophie Tucker's ex-husband Ernie informed her of a n...
Standing on Principle
One day during a lecture tour, Mark Twain entered a local barber shop for a shav...
Mutual Feeling
While visiting Blenheim Palace (the Churchill family's ancestral home) one day, ...
Fitting Reply
Noel Coward once spent a very uncomfortable night at a bug-infested hotel in the...
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern
In April 1967, Tom Stoppard's "Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead" premiered ...
Bare Churchill
In 1946, Winston Churchill traveled to Fulton, Missouri, to deliver a speech and...
Red in the Face?
One day shortly after his retirement from the University of Chicago, Robert Hutc...
Major Problem
One day while campaigning against Dwight Eisenhower during the 1952 presidential...
Staggering Problem
One day during the production of The Captain Hates the Sea (1934), direct...
Anag-Rammed?
Washington Post columnist Gene Weingarten was once invited by Britain's <...
Carpetbagger
When John McCain first ran for election in Arizona (after living in the state fo...
99.998% Perspiration
Someone once remarked upon the huge number of failures which Thomas Edison had r...
Scottish Striker?
During a tight match one day, Partick Thistle manager John Lambie was informed t...
Joe, Jr?
Shortly after the appearance of her Book of the Penis, Maggie Paley was a...
Top Management?
Atlanta Braves shortstop Darrel Chaney was once asked how the team's management ...
Stu Grimson
Chicago Blackhawks left winger Stu Grimson was once asked why he kept a color ph...
Labouchere
One day during his tenure as a British attache in St. Petersburg, Henry Labouche...
Sly Prediction
A firm believer in the astrological 'sciences,' Louis XI was hardly surprised wh...
Dinner Party
Thomas Edison was a workaholic who regarded formal dinners as a waste of time. A...
Cub Reporter
An editor once admonished his cub reporter, Mark Twain, never to state as fact a...
Webster
One day at school, Daniel Webster, having committed some youthful indiscretion o...
Schumann-Oink
One evening, the contralto Ernestine Schumann-Heink, noted for her enormous girt...
Resignation
While visiting his club one evening, Oliver Herford was approached by a notoriou...
Waters of Truth
While giving an abolitionist speech one day, Henry Clay found himself struggling...
Lonsdale
"The only deadly sin in the eyes of the membership of the Garrick Club was to be...
Book Clubs?
One day Ezra Pound, offended by a remark which Lascelles Abercrombie, a fellow p...
Pearls of Wisdom?
Dorothy Parker once encountered Clare Boothe Luce in a narrow doorway. "Age befo...
Professional Humorist
Following one of George Ade's legendary after-dinner speeches, a noted lawyer ro...
John Holmes: Warm Feet
z (brother of Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.) fell into a coma and lay motionless fo...
Oscar Party
"One morning in the summer of 1950, Billy Wilder was sitting alone, eating break...
Round Retort
While sitting with a group of fellow "Round Table" luminaries in the Algonquin H...
Frosty Reply?
While attending a dinner party one evening, Poet Laureate Robert Frost and his f...
Phony Solution
An unwritten rule at Warner Brothers studios stipulated that its founder never b...
Popular Representation
When an unscrupulous industrialist was nominated for a cabinet post one day, one...
Punctuated Equilibrium
"After once proclaiming that [Stephen Jay Gould] had brought paleontology back t...
Golfing for Cats
Famed British humorist Alan Coren was once advised that anyone seeking to draw t...
Gasbag
One evening, the rival lawyers Joseph Choate and Chauncey M. Depew found themsel...
Eat me, Zappa!
During a concert one evening, Frank Zappa was dismayed to hear someone in the au...
Wedding Present
One day in November 2000, Elton John was asked to suggest the "perfect wedding p...
Horticulture
During a conversation about usage one day, Dorothy Parker was asked to compose a...
Favorite Course
Shortly after Cheap Trick guitarist Rick Nielsen's son went off to university on...
No. Kumquats.
When Johnny Carson first signed on as host of "The Tonight Show" he was so swamp...
Lieberman-Cheney Debate
After his stint as George Bush's Secretary of Defense, Dick Cheney entered the b...
Shanghai Surprise
One Saturday during the production of The Lady from Shanghai, Orson Welle...
Whistler
One day a female admirer told James Whistler that a certain landscape view rathe...
Highway to Hell!
During the American invasion of Panama in 1989, troops blasted AC/DC's "Highway ...
Famous Last Words
Toward the end of his life, Voltaire was advised to foreswear Satan. He declined...
Destalinization
In the course of denouncing Joseph Stalin at a public meeting one day, Nikita Kh...
Insomnia
One day while Ronald Knox was suffering from a serious bout of insomnia, he was ...
Zsa Zsa Gabor: First Thing
A women's magazine once asked a number of famous women: "What is the first thing...
Wooster Sauce
Horatio Bottomley once arrived at the home of Lord Cholmondley. "I wish to speak...
Devil May Care
"Georges Cuvier's outstanding achievement resulted from his ability to reconstru...
Basic Logic
Abraham Lincoln was once called in to settle a dispute by two men who had been a...
SASE Sentiment
One day during the Civil War Abraham Lincoln received a letter from a female adm...
Dylan Thomas: Llareggub
Dylan Thomas was once asked what "Llareggub" (the name of the Welsh fishing vill...
Gentleman
"Noel Coward and I were in Paris," Beatrice Lillie once recalled. "Adjoining roo...
Bandage Man
The famed publisher Richard Simon (the Simon in "Simon and Schuster") once decid...
Parliament of Owls?
At a reception in honour of several former British prime ministers, Harold Macmi...
Civilized
Lytton Strachey, like the other philosophers, writers, and artists in the Blooms...
Margot Asquith: Silent Trea...
While visiting Hollywood one year, Margot Asquith (the second wife of British Li...
Baseball Organist
During a minor league baseball game at Jack Russell Stadium in 1985, the organis...
Groucho Martian
While interviewing an unusual woman one day, Groucho Marx was surprised to hear ...
Triers
As the Allies advanced into Germany at the end of World War II, General Patton r...
Dietrich Close Up
One day Marlene Dietrich railed at her photographer for producing a series of un...
GUT Reaction
Like many of his colleagues (among them Albert Einstein) Werner Heisenberg spent...
Rachel Nichols: Orgy Lover
"You played an orgy-loving waitress on 'Sex and the City,'" a reporter once remi...
Unprecedented Insult
One day in court, the future Canadian prime minister Richard Bedford Bennett fac...
David Duchovny: Teacup
During a photo shoot one day, David Duchovny posed for a series of remarkable ...
Judy Garland: Randy Munchkins
"The little people who played Muchkins in The Wizard of Oz were tough, wo...
Hugh Hefner: Blondes Have M...
Hugh Hefner was once asked whether blondes really have more fun. His reply? ...
Sandy Koufax: Pig Roast
Shortly after joining the Los Angeles Dodgers, Sandy Koufax attended a pig roast...
Dorothy Parker: Shedules
"Dorothy Parker was at a party in New York where an American actor who had appea...
Coral Browne: Golden Phallus
While visiting backstage at the National Theatre one day, Coral Browne was asked...
Winston Churchill: Secret o...
As he approached his 90th birthday, Winston Churchill was asked the secret of lo...
Making a Mountain From a Mo...
The critic Alexander Woollcott was famed for his ample girth. In the midst of a ...
Time Well Wasted
The tyrant Dionysius was dining one day with Philip II of Macedon, who took to s...
Delicate Subject
William Gladstone once observed that Benjamin Disraeli enjoyed an enviable reput...
Wit's End
George Jeffreys presided at the "Bloody Assizes" - the trial of those involved i...
Election Fraud
Martin Van Buren's presidential election campaign in 1840 was bedeviled by probl...
Peerless Wit
One day a studio usher knocked on the door of Ethel Barrymore's Hollywood dressi...
Amateur Performance
Although Hamlet would later become one of John Barrymore's most famous roles, th...
Late Rehearsal
During a terrible row at a late rehearsal, John Barrymore told the leading lady ...
No, By George!
Late in life, George Burns was asked whether he planned ever retire. "Retire?" B...
Unremitting Kindness
Douglas Jerrold once fell into conversation with a man on the subject of a mutua...
Lateral Thinking?
Upon first moving to Hollywood, Nunnally Johnson was asked how he expected to fi...
Turbulent Sea?
Famed screenwriter Nunnally Johnson once arrived at a restaurant to have lunch w...
Augustan Dismissal
Augustus once ordered that a young insubordinate soldier be dismissed from his s...
Awkward Question
"One of Mme Aubernon's guests was relating a conversation with his young son. 'P...
Charming Introduction
One night at an evening reception, Eugene d'Albert introduced a friend to his ne...
Friendly Favors
Despite reasonably sound finances, Peter Altenberg possessed a curious mania for...
Sweet Exchange
J. M. Barrie's Peter Pan evolved gradually from the stories which he told...
Soothing Baum
Wizard of Oz creator L. Frank Baum, whose weak heart prevented him from s...
Robert Benchley: Sun Lamp
The great humorist Robert Benchley was once asked why he used a sun lamp in Cali...
Littoral Interpretation
Israeli Prime Minister David Ben-Gurion was once upbraided by President Chaim We...
20 / 20 Vision?
At a state banquet one day, Mrs. Sargent Shriver, the wife of the US ambassador ...
Imp of Darkness?
Sarah Bernhardt was once referred to by an American clergyman as "an imp of dark...
Smoking Insult?
During a rehearsal of one of Oscar Wilde's plays, Sarah Bernhardt quarreled with...
Sarah Bernhardt
In her last years, Sarah Bernhardt lived on an upper level in a Paris apartment ...
Ben Folds 500?
Ben Folds was once asked whether he was seeing anyone. "Yes, I'm seeing 'anyone'...
Afterthought
The composer Max Reger once received a nasty review from a critic named Rudolf L...
Smoky Logic
Congressman Jack Brady was once reproached by a young woman for smoking on an el...
Heaven For Dummies?
St. Augustine was once asked, "What was God doing through all the eternity of ti...
Go East, Young Man?
In October 1863, after a successful lecture tour along the eastern seaboard, hum...
Albert Schweitzer: Jungle H...
Many of the poverty-stricken patients admitted to Albert Schweitzer's jungle hos...
Grand Appetite
One evening shortly after his debut in "South Pacific" Ezio Pinza, the show's st...
Contempt
William Wordsworth once declared that he had "the greatest contempt for Aristotl...
Trivial Observation
Shaw once found himself seated at a dinner party beside a pompous young bore who...
Born Blind
George Shearing, who had been born blind, was once asked whether he had been bli...
The Burbs
Joseph Choate once opposed an attorney from Westchester County (a wealthy reside...
Royal Toast
John Wilkes, having become a supporter of Pitt's government (in 1786), was often...
Waiting on Fame
Shortly after her "American Idol" victory, Kelly Clarkson appeared as a guest on...
Horace Greeley: Toilet Paper
While traveling by train in New York one day, Tribune founder Horace Gree...
Boston Beer Co.
Boston Beer Company founder Jim Koch was once asked how he could possibly justif...
Khrushchev
During a fiery summit meeting with Nikita Khrushchev one day, President Kennedy ...
Labouchere's Sister
As a student at Cambridge, Henry Labouchere was stopped one day by a university ...
Mule in Lamb's Clothing?
Charles Lamb was once upbraided by a fuckingvisor for his tardiness. "You arrive...
Lang Portrait
The Archbishop of Canterbury, Cosmo Gordon Lang, once commissioned a portrait fr...
Prince of Whales?
The Prince of Wales (later King Edward VII) once had a quarrel with his mistress...
Time Will Tell?
Gracie Allen - who played the scatterbrained wife in the famed Burns & Allen com...
Comman Courtesy
Margaret Anglin once left a message on fellow actress Minnie Fiske's dressing ro...
Vicious Circle?
Dorothy Parker and a friend once fell into a conversation about a certain uninhi...
Alec Guinness: Measured Reply
Sir Alec Guinness once returned a script with a polite rejection, and had his le...
Keating Five
Shortly after his Lincoln Savings and Loan declared bankruptcy (with over $2 bil...
Aural Wisdom
Some 50 years after his family had left Germany, Walter Kissinger was asked why ...
Gene Simmons: What to Look For
KISS frontman Gene Simmons was once asked what he looked for in women. "What I l...
Second Thoughts?
At a dinner party one evening, Joseph Choate was asked whom he would most like t...
Sobering Thought
Winston Churchill exchanged heated remarks with a female MP at a dinner party on...
Churchill's 80th Birthday
One of the photographers present at Winston Churchill's eightieth birthday expre...
Unorthodox Reply
Daniel Chwolson was once asked whether his decision to join the Orthodox Church ...
Henry Clay: Clay in His Hands
While Henry Clay's oratorical prowess won him the adulation of much of the House...
Grover Cleveland: Pro and C...
President Grover Cleveland, though constantly at war with the Senate, got on wel...
May-Upuan Pa Ba-Be Not?
"[Filipino lyricist Levi] Celerio apparently once hopped on a bus in Cubao bound...
Surgical Precision
One day, a witness in Judge Edward Ellenborough's courtroom was asked to identif...
Soulful Explanation
Erasmus was once reproached for having failed to observe the Lenten fast. His re...
Long Silence?
Fernandel once visited a new barbershop. Having finished his handiwork, the barb...
Ingenue
One day Alfred Capus attended a rehearsal during which a certain ingenue (in the...
Handshake
Ronald Firbank once gravely offended the writer Eddie Marsh with his disrespectf...
Mud
The American sculptor Jo Davidson, noted for his celebrity sculpture portraits, ...
Battle of the Sexes
"Much of this talk about feminism is nonsense," Beatrice Webb was told one day. ...
9-11
Shortly after the terrorist attacks on September 11th, 2001, U.S. Attorney Gener...
XXXL?
During World War II, British soldiers discovered that placing a condom over a gu...
Charles Barkley: Height of ...
Charles Barkley once threw a 5'2" fan (who, apparently, was looking for a fight)...
Black Humor
"When the Reverend Harold Davidson, the eccentric unfrocked rector of Stiffkey, ...
Hawthorne, Jr.
Nathaniel Hawthorne's son Julian (who was often confused with his famous father)...
Composing?
Shortly after the death of a well-known composer, someone, unaware of the news, ...
Class Distinction
C. S. Lewis, entering the first-class compartment of a return train after a stre...
Crafty Writer
Sinclair Lewis was once booked to give a lecture at Columbia University on the w...
Elderly Englishmen
Winston Churchill was once informed that a man over seventy-five years of age ha...
Harry Truman: Politics
Harry Truman was once asked by a young student how he might get started in polit...
Hollywood Agent
During the early stages of production on A Midsummer Night's Dream in 193...
Creative Destruction
When, at an official reception during the Civil War, Abraham Lincoln referred to...
Honestly, Abe
One day during the Civil War, Abraham Lincoln was told by an admirer that in his...
Sothern Breeze?
On April 13, 1865, with the Civil War over, orders were given to end the draft. ...
Purest Greek
Canadian prime minister John A. MacDonald and Hector Langevin (the former solici...
Casting Call Girl
Joan Crawford was once asked whether, in a bid to land a coveted role, she had e...
Old Joke
A reporter in search of information once wired Cary Grant's agent: "HOW OLD CARY...
Oscar Wilde & Christopher C...
Oscar Wilde was once buttonholed by an American admirer. "Wonderful man, Columbu...
Montgomery II?
In 1944 Alan Brooke, the brilliant chief of the British imperial general staff (...
11
A reporter once asked George Moore how it was that he enjoyed such excellent hea...
Ronald Reagan: Seasoned Pol...
Despite concern over Ronald Reagan's age (69) when he ran for the presidency in ...
Churchill & DeGaulle
Winston Churchill was once informed by his butler that French President Charles ...
Isaac Bashevis Singer: Free...
Isaac Bashevis Singer was once asked whether he believed in free will or predest...
F. E. Smith: Wise Guy
F. E. Smith was famed for his dry wit. At the close of one particularly lengthy ...
Jack Squat
While crossing the Atlantic aboard a steam ship one summer, the director Mervyn ...
Dogma
The Abbe Mugnier was once asked whether he believed in hell. "Yes, because it is...
Rock And A Hard Place?
Mme de Stael and the beautiful Mme Recamier once found themselves seated at an e...
Lifetime Contract
After one particularly good season, famed St. Louis Cardinals manager Whitey Her...
Play Bill
When Mrs. Jordan, a mistress of William IV who was receiving a thousand pounds a...
Symbolic Gesture
All of the famed philosopher and mathematician Willard Van Orman Quine's work wa...
Little Italy
During the negotiations at Versailles following World War I, Woodrow Wilson adam...
Heckler
"As a professional clown," Nancy-Jo Wright once remarked, "I entertain groups at...
Denis Thatcher: Iron Lady?
Shortly after moving into the British prime minister's official residence (10 Do...
Starlet
"I asked Dylan Thomas why he'd come to Hollywood," Shelley Winters once recalled...
Skateboard Stunt
During a guest appearance on "Live with Regis and Kelly" one day, pro skateboard...
GG
For years, Gucci was as famed for its founding-family fueds as for its fashionab...
Bubba
Bubba Smith was once asked whether he thought homosexuals could find happiness i...
Cymbalism
Sir Malcolm Sargent was once asked what one had to know in order to play the cym...
Ina Claire
Some time after her marriage to the romantic silent screen hero John Gilbert, th...
Too Much Information
In January 2001, Andrew Lloyd Webber's second wife, the singer Sarah Brightman, ...
Colin Powell: Like a Baby
One day in February 2003, with America on the verge of a war with Iraq, Secretar...
Puzzling Name?
Rip Torn was 'blessed' with an unusual name. "When," he was once asked, "did thi...
Old Complaint
George Burns was once asked, late in life, about his preference for younger wome...
Intellectual Property
Winston Churchill often dined with friends, dignitaries and celebrities at Chart...
For Whom the Bell Tolls?
Ernest Hemingway was once approached by an autograph-seeker in a Sun Valley rest...
Baldwins & Penns
Stephen Baldwin and Chris Penn became close friends after working together on th...
Just Cause For Divorce?
While having dinner one night, Milton Berle asked his wife for a glass of water....
Lawrence Whelk?
One day Milton Berle sat down at the comedians' Round Table at the Hillcrest Cou...
Paramount Olympus?
Paramount Studios chief Adolph Zukor once offered $30,000 for the film rights to...
Bully?
Why was Larry Clark's 2001 film Bully released unrated? "We couldn't get ...
High Steaks?
Lauren Bacall once attended a New Year's Eve party at which the Shah of Iran was...
Oscar Wilde's Masterpiece
Wilde was once asked to make various changes to one of his plays. Wilde declined...
Barrister
Dorothy Parker was once told that a certain London actress had broken her leg. "...
Kid Gloves
At his historic first meeting with James Whistler (a fellow American living in L...
A.S.S. Enterprise?
Leaving the Algonquin Hotel one evening, a well-lubricated Robert Benchley found...
Well-Rounded Actress
On the opening night of one of his plays, Alexandre Dumas was approached by a pr...
Gods And Monsters
Sergei Koussevitzky, the toast of Boston, was once approached at a reception by ...
Round Table
For years, George Burns ate lunch every day at a corner table in the Men's Grill...
Fox in the Hole?
Charles Fox once asked George Selwyn whether he had attended the execution of a ...
Blooming Awful
The head of Bloomingdale's department store in New York once sponsored a Kaufman...
The Real Dali
"Salvador Dali and Lorraine Bracco, aka Dr. Melfi [on 'The Sopranos'], had a bit...
Zsa Zsa
Zsa Zsa Gabor was once asked how many husbands she had had. "You mean," she wryl...
Nymphomaniac
While hosting "The Tonight Show" one evening, Jack Paar found himself discussing...
Way to Go
One day during a lecture tour of the northern states, Wendell Phillips was accos...
Edna Ferber
One day Noel Coward encountered the author Edna Ferber, who happened to be weari...
Missionary Position?
While filling out a market research form one day, Nubar Gulbenkian, one of the w...
Classique Thurber
Thurber was once approached at a cocktail party by a female admirer who declared...
Whistler & Wilde
Not surprisingly, James Whistler and Oscar Wilde, both notorious attention-lovin...
Frankly Brilliant
After the death of his wife in the early 1770s, Benjamin Franklin considered mar...
Margaret Smith: Change Room
While shopping at Ann Taylor one day Margaret Smith was interrupted by a clerk a...
Fire and Ice
One wintry evening, Grant entered a hotel in Galena, Illinois. Sitting by the fi...
Big & Tall
George Bernard Shaw, tall and lanky, stood in marked contrast to his rotund riva...
Classic Thurber
Prompted by the success of The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, Samuel Goldwy...
Courting Jusitce?
When Robert Hutchins was dean of the Yale Law School, he once fell into conversa...
Brain vs Brawn
The celebrated dancer Isadora Duncan once wrote to George Bernard Shaw declaring...
Told In Vain?
A certain matronly woman, in conversation with Cicero, vainly declared: "Why, I ...
Noble Soul
A Prussian nobleman who had been a revolutionary of sorts in his own country onc...
Jay Leno: Laura Linney
During a guest appearance on "The Tonight Show With Jay Leno" one evening, Laura...
Cowed?
One afternoon Jane Cowl attended a matinee performance of Hamlet on Broadway. He...
Sixth Rhapsody
Merit Rosenthal often teased a certain friend (and fellow pianist) about his pen...
Toby Keith: Famous Comment
After playing a show one night, Toby Keith stepped onto his tour bus and found a...
Sexual Politics
One day in the Georgia Statehouse, representative Anne Mueller complained to Hou...
Ode to Posterity
Jean Jacques Rousseau once sent Voltaire a copy of his "Ode to Posterity," seeki...
Superman Ali
Shortly before takeoff one day, a flight attendant approached Muhammad Ali and p...
God Knows Where
One night a group of Mark Twain's friends in New York, having recognized the dat...
Ghostwriter
Alexandre Dumas's prodigious output was largely attributable to a vast corps of ...
Discriminating Taste
Thomas Beecham was once asked whether it was true that he preferred not to have ...
Duel!
"For many years the duel fought between Sir Hierome Sankey and
Sir William Pett...
Lachrimose Landry
Former running back Walt Garrison was once asked whether he had ever seen legend...
Lincoln's Grant
Notwithstanding his remarkable success (including the capture of Fort Donelson a...
Fool
While attending a party one evening, Dorothy Parker was confronted by an arrogan...
Close Harmony
During a particulary dismal dress rehearsal of Dorothy Parker's play ...
Virchow's Blessing?
One day when appendectomy operations were just becoming standard medical practic...
Harold Macmillan & Khrushch...
One day in September 1960, the famously unflappable British prime minister Harol...
Relative Weakness
Shortly after Albert Einstein fled from Germany (in 1932), one hundred Nazi prof...
Rural Welcome
France's Henry IV was passing through a small town when a deputation of local bu...
Kennedy Wit
"Caroline's very bright," JFK's father Joseph once remarked of his granddaughter...
Honorable Member
Sheridan was once asked to apologize for having insulted a fellow Member of Parl...
Ambition
A young man once asked Mozart for advice on composing a symphony. Mozart replied...
Friendly Reply
George Bernard Shaw once sent Winston Churchill a note inviting him to the debut...
Fitting Response
"Mrs. Stowe was leaving for Florida one morning, and Clemens [the young Mark Twa...
Game For Music?
While visiting a restaurant one evening, George Bernard Shaw and a friend found ...
Amateur Photographer?
Senator Barry Goldwater, a talented amateur photographer, once took a picture of...
Lambasted?
In the course of a lecture one day, Charles Lamb was rudely interrupted by a his...
Social "Science"?
The Nobel-prize winning economist George Stigler was once asked why sociology, p...
Washington Monument
Shortly after the publication of a scandalous biography of George Washington, pr...
Customary Declaration
One day during a lecture tour in 1882, Oscar Wilde was asked by a customs office...
Playground Bully
Shortly after winning the mayoral race (with a 91% mandate) in 2002, Baltimore m...
Ann Landers: Embassy Reception
While attending an embassy reception one evening, the syndicated columnist Ann L...
Harold Macmillan: Fathers a...
Among Harold Macmillan's fiercest critics was his own son, Maurice, who once sen...
Tedious
While attending the premiere of one of his plays at the Theatre Francais with a ...
Shouts and Murmurs
Alexander Woollcott was once asked to sign a first-edition copy of one of his bo...
Mayo
One morning, Dr. Mayo's mail was found to contain a letter from a spiritualist. ...
Heaven and Hell
Lord Desborough was infuriated one day to find his obituary printed in ...
Britney Spears Halftime Show
Jay Mohr was once asked why the Super Bowl halftime show always sucks. "Too many...
Fifth Column Warning
US Ambassador to Germany James Gerard, having previously described Arthur Zimmer...
Pearly Gates
Harrison Ford was once asked: If heaven exists, what would you want God to say t...
Los Angeles Country Club
Victor Mature once applied for membership in the exclusive Los Angeles Country C...
Cracked Knut
During the winter of 1894-95 the Norwegian novelist Knut Hamsun visited Paris fo...
Classy Response
Barbara Cartland was once interviewed for the BBC radio program "Today". The int...
Perfect Couple
During his first term in office, Dwight Eisenhower appointed Arthur Burns to ser...
Charles Calvary?
As an undergraduate prank one day, Charles Calverley and some of his classmates ...
Black and Tans
Dunsany Castle, Lord Dunsany's home in County Meath, Ireland, was once sacked by...
Sick Horse
When one of her horses became ill, Elizabeth Arden called the world-famous Mayo ...
Secrets
After the battle of Assaye the young Arthur Wellesley was enlisted to negotiate ...
Producers
Shortly after Jeffrey Katzenberg's Dick Tracy opened (on the same day as ...
Calling Card
George Bernard Shaw once received a calling card from a certain woman noted for ...
Jarry
One day Alfred Jarry, a man famed for his eccentricity, fired his pistol into a ...
Urine Sample
Noel Coward was once asked for a urine sample by the doctor in attendance at the...
Scenic Route
Captivated by the astonishing beauty of one of the young ladies at his court, He...
Thurlow
One day during his stint at Gonville and Caius College, Cambridge, Edward Thurlo...
Punch Drunk
Late one night, world heavyweight boxing champion Jack Dempsey, was interrupted ...
Talent Scout
An aspiring nymphette, eager to appear on "Talent Scouts," once sent Irving Mans...
Royal Insult
Famed paparazzo Glenn Harvey once found himself speaking with Lady Diana Spencer...
Meet & Greet
Associated Press | May 19, 2000
Paducah, Ky. - Lots of candidates kiss babie...
Wham!
The Guiness Book of World Records once listed Alexander Woollcott's revie...
Phallus
Alfred Jarry was a slight man, standing just five feet tall. On his mantel, howe...
Hot Ticket?
One day Christopher Atkinson began a lecture by explaining that he would be exam...
Sex Life
"Whenever I go on a talk show I am invariably asked about Warren Beatty's sex li...
Morgan's Yacht
J. P. Morgan once found himself discussing his yacht with a fellow financier. "I...
Charmer
Henry Clay once found himself conversing with a woman of his remote acquaintance...
Elizabeth Taylor: Many Wedd...
During one of her many weddings Elizabeth Taylor was asked by a presiding offici...
Sharp Shooter
"He [George Jessel] took a shot at a doctor once--the one who Norma [Talmadge, h...
Rothschild's Father
One evening, Lord Rothschild alighted from a hansom cab, giving the driver a gen...
Churchill's Lion
During the Yalta conference in 1945, Winston Churchill and the British delegatio...
When We Were Very Sore
Dorothy Parker was dismayed to learn one day that, in a bid to promote her lates...
Awkward Question
Zsa Zsa Gabor was once asked which of the Gabor sisters was the oldest. "Well," ...
Gasbag
At the Oxford Union one day in 1926, Winston Churchill tapped the portly R.B. Ha...
Morley
Robert Morley once bumped into his old friend and fellow actor Llewellyn Rees, w...
Remembrance
While attending one of Paderewski's farewell performances one evening, Merit Ros...
Blithe Spirits
During a difficult rehearsal of Blithe Spirit one day, fellow thespians C...
Asinine Insult
Henry Clay and Massachusetts senator Daniel Webster were chatting outside Washin...
Tonight Show Sex Study
"A study has found that gay men, on average, have substantially larger organs th...
Rudy Giuliani: SNL
After the terrorist attacks in New York and Washington in September 2001, comedy...
Winston Churchill: Preposte...
A critic once castigated Winston Churchill for composing a sentence which ended ...
Barry Manilow: True Believer
Barry Manilow was once asked whether he believed in God. "Yes," he replied. ...
Lister
One day Joseph Lister was summoned to assist a wealthy lord with a fishbone whic...
Bench Warmer?
Shortly before performing at a sold-out recital one evening, Arthur Rubinstein -...
Jockular Comment
One day at rehearsal John Gielgud declared that "all men must wear jockstraps un...
Liliencron
Detlev von Liliencron's finances were a source of continual difficulty. One day,...
No Surrender
After suffering heavy casualties at the Argonne in World War I, General Summeral...
Tour of Iran
During an official tour of Iran one year, French president Charles de Gaulle and...
Introducing von Bulow...
While hurrying up a narrow, dimly-lit staircase one day, the conductor Hans von ...
Wily Woolworth
When Frank Winfield Woolworth opened his first Woolworth's store, a merchant dow...
Thomson's Lasses
The famed physicist William Thomson (later Lord Kelvin) was a professor of natur...
Connoisseur
Johannes Brahms was once invited to dinner by a noted wine connoisseur. In the c...
Welcome Black
During a guest appearance on "Last Call with Carson Daly" one evening, Jay Mohr ...
Francis Ford Coppola: Apoca...
The completion of Francis Ford Coppola's classic 1979 Vietnam War epic ...
Davis & Schwarzenegger
One day during the 2003 California gubernatorial election, Governor Gray Davis, ...
Don Cherry: Trading Esposito
One day early in the 1975-76 season, after years of glory with the Boston Bruins...
Classic Sutton
Like many pitchers, Don Sutton was often accused of using foreign substances on ...
Iron Lady
British prime minister Margaret Thatcher was famed for her domineering manner. D...
Albertans & Eskimos
In 1932, William "Bible Bill" Aberhart, the radio evangelist-turned-politician, ...
Bennett & Edwards
Before embarking upon a political career future Canadian prime minister Richard ...
Al Franken & Bill O'Reilly:...
In 2003, Al Franken published a hilarious book skewering several prominent Repub...
Katharine Hepburn: Pants
Katharine Hepburn almost always wore pants, even when doing so was decidedly unf...
Willa Ford: Who's Counting?
"This might be a big letdown to guys," Willa Ford once told an interviewer, "but...
Mick Jagger: Laughter Lines
While attending a party one evening, the jazz singer George Melly was introduced...
Jackie Gleason: Toots Shor'...
While playing golf with Jackie Gleason one day, Toots Shor racked up a brutal sc...
Rebecca Romijn-Stamos: Godsend
Shortly after the release of Godsend (2004), Rebecca Romijn-Stamos made a...
John Tortorella: Nerves
After dispatching the Philadelphia Flyers in the third round of the 2004 NHL pla...
Diana Taurasi: Booing?
In 2004, the University of Connecticut Huskies won a hard-fought game against th...
Derrick Shepherd: Low-Slung...
"A Louisiana state representative wants to make it illegal for people to wear lo...
Jack E. Leonard: Let's Play...
During a show one night, comedian Jack E. Leonard was heckled by a man in the au...
Flattery vs Flatulence
The hedonistic - and fawning - philosopher Aristippus won a comfortable sinecure...
Civil War
One day during the Civil War, New York Governor William Seward found himself in ...
Dorian Gray?
A reporter once asked Susan Lucci whether Erica Kane, her character on ABC's ...
Reading James Joyce
James Joyce was once asked about the demands his writing made upon the reader. "...
Unearned Increment
Following his marriage to the heiress Grace Joynson in 1895, William Hicks adopt...
Smart Asset
As editor of The Smart Set, H. L. Mencken took Joseph Conrad under his wi...
American Animal
"If you find so much that is unworthy of reverence in the United States," H. L. ...
Wilde About Flowers
Oscar Wilde, staying with friends in the country, arrived for breakfast one morn...
Existential Crisis?
When an express train to London made an unscheduled stop at Reading station, Cyr...
Cold Comfort
"On the first night of that unfortunate play Henry James's ...
Fred Allen: Five Thousand C...
Jack Parr idolized the comedian Fred Allen. At their first meeting, the "Tonight...
Wilde Assertion
Oscar Wilde was once asked why he was not a socialist. "I prefer," he replied, "...
Billy Crystal: Medical Advice
Garry Shandling once asked Billy Crystal for medical advice. "I said, 'My penis ...
Eating Crow?
In the middle of one of Henry Ward Beecher's most potent political speeches, a m...
Gossip
The famed theater manager Lilian Baylis vehemently discouraged romances between ...
John McCain: Captive For Fr...
After enduring more than five harrowing years (much of it in solitary confinemen...
Height of Exaggeration
Robert Benchley was once asked whether he knew Robert Sherwood, a distinguished ...
Whore of Babylon
Scandalized clergymen across the United States demonized Sarah Bernhardt from th...
Adolph Green: Taste of Death
"[Broadway composer Adolph Green] never stopped insisting on delight. Green's wi...
Rigaudy Portrait?
The French painter Hyacinthe Rigaud was once commissioned to paint the portrait ...
Couplet
Antoine de Rivarol was once asked his opinion of a couplet produced by a certain...
Heaven Song?
Mark Twain's wife was not enamored of her husband's cruder domestic compositions...
BS Fan?
While conversing with George Bernard Shaw and his wife one day, the writer Patri...
Wallensteined?
While conducting the New York Philharmonic, Bruno Walter, noticed that Alfred Wa...
Pair o' Doxies?
In the course of a debate in the House of Lords on the Test Laws (under which ca...
Passion Play
On the mandatory divinity section of an oral examination at Oxford University, O...
William Wordsworth & Willia...
One day Charles Lamb happened to hear William Wordsworth declare that he could w...
Very Well
The appearance of T. S. Eliot's obscure Four Quartets was welcomed with s...
Lecturer's Invitation
One day late in life Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr. received an invitation to delive...
Willie $utton
The notorious bandit Willie Sutton was once asked why he had decided to rob bank...
Rubbish
While speaking at a rally in the mid-1960s, Edmund Wilson was interrupted by a h...
'eavy Drinker
One day Israel Zangwill encountered a certain newly-wealthy peer (whose accent d...
Harvard U?
The eminent Greek scholar Paul Shorey once met Robert Hutchins on the University...
Can't I Own Canadians?
Shortly after the famously fundamentalist Laura Schlessinger attacked homosexual...
Worst Enemy
George Kaufman was once buttonholed at a Hollywood party by a fellow writer who ...
Patriotism
After he was appointed Slade Professor of Fine Arts at University College, Londo...
Obliging Johnson
Johnson once found himself engaged in a lengthy argument with a dim-witted gentl...
Wavian Simile
Upon his return from the battle of Crete in 1941, Evelyn Waugh was asked for his...
Vegetables
In 1965, when the University of California at Santa Cruz (UCSC) opened its doors...
Pointed Argument?
One day, Damocles - a sycophantic member of Dionysus the Elder's court in the Gr...
Sharon Stone: Joe BS
In his notorious Hollywood expose, American Rhapsody, star screenwriter J...
Sibling Rivalry?
Notwithstanding the credits on the Coen brothers' pictures (directed by Joel, pr...
Celebrity Driving School
In May 2003, "Lily Savage" star Paul O'Grady finally passed his driving test - a...
Mitford & Evans
Dame Edith Evans was once informed that the noted writer Nancy Mitford was stayi...
Adam Duritz: Performance An...
Counting Crows frontman Adam Duritz was once asked whether he ever got stage fri...
Motivation
One day on the set, director Roman Polanski was asked by an actress about her ch...
Making Perfect?
In September 2002, the Dixie Chicks appeared on "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno....
Brief Rebuttal
During a Supreme Court hearing one day, another lawyer demonstrated that Joseph ...
President Ted Kennedy
In 1998, Senate Minority Leader Tom Daschle, having forgotten that Senator Ted K...
Universal Levity
Elisabeth Jungmann once commented to Max Beerbohm how much she would like to hav...
Roger Ailes: War Protest
One day during the war in Iraq in March 2003, antiwar protesters blocked traffic...
Shelley Winters: Winters' C...
Scheduled to meet a certain Italian producer, Shelley Winters called a friend in...
Beauty and the Beast
One day Shirley Temple told her young daughter Lorax (who later became a bass pl...
Sad Case?
Frank Case once met a dejected Faulkner in the lobby of New York's Algonquin Hot...
Dim Bulb?
Sheridan's son Tom had no illusions about political corruption. "Many men who ar...
Bishop Be Damned
As lord chancellor, Edward Thurlow was charged with dispensing several church be...
Serendipity
Alexander Fleming's famous discovery of penicillin at St Mary's Hospital in 1928...
Fontenelle
When various accounting anomalies were discovered at the French Academy, one of ...
Immortal Wit
"What is your opinion," an Italian woman once asked Isaac Newton, "of the immort...
Lost Patients?
At the age of ninety, Konrad Adenauer caught a severe cold. His physician, exasp...
John Komrade Galbraith
The noted right-wing journalist William F. Buckley, Jr. once tried to arrange a ...
Sumner
Little love was lost between Ulysses S. Grant and Massachusetts senator Charles ...
Reverend Hartke: Blue Laguna?
Reverend Hartke was a confidante of many American presidents, a national leader ...
Daly Dose?
John Daly, a heavy drinker, was once interrogated about this favorite vice: "I l...
Opposites Attract?
During a ball in St. Petersburg one evening, Bismarck flattered an attractive pa...
Jim Kern: Leaving the Mound
Texas Rangers pitcher Jim Kern reluctantly left the mound during a game one day....
Marital Ties?
During a visit to an Australian university on a royal tour in 1954, Prince Phili...
Salary Cut
After one particularly bad season, New York Yankees pitcher Vernon Gomez was ask...
Grudge Match
While campaigning for the governorship against George Pataki, Andrew Cuomo, a "h...
Noble Transport
Joseph Choate, visiting at a certain duke's residence one day, found himself sta...
Tupac Shakur: Bad Credit?
Wendy Day (of Rap Coalition) once visited Tupac Shakur in Clinton Prison (45 min...
Open Secret
Golfing legend Ben Hogan was once asked (by Nick Faldo) whether there was any "s...
Grrrrrrrrrrrudging Donation
"When an artist is given a solo exhibition [at the Guggenheim museum], Dennison ...
Harry Truman: Historic Moment
One day during the Christmas holiday in 1955, President Harry Truman was dismaye...
Ten Commandments
One day during the production of The Ten Commandments (1923), Paramount c...
Congress
In 1846, Lincoln ran for Congress as a Whig against an evangelical Methodist nam...
Long Explanation
O. Henry once wrote to his publisher, Frank Munsey, to request an advance of fif...
Picasso & Braque
One day a painter named Roland Penrose dropped in on Pablo Picasso, who was in t...
Master Taken?
As a schoolboy, Tooke was once asked why a certain verb governed a particular ca...
Secret Service
One evening during his tenure as British Home Secretary, Roy Jenkins dined with ...
House of Commoners
Upon hearing the little-known author James Harris' maiden speech before Parliame...
Spencer Tracy
Actor Spencer Tracy was once asked what he looked for in a script. His reply? "D...
Trouble at the White House
On April 12th, 1945, Harry Truman was summoned to the White House. Ushered into ...
Pointed Remark?
The portly Edmund Burke once delivered a passionate oration before the House of ...
Hollywood Agent
Ignorance of the great classics was widespread during Hollywood's Golden Age. On...
Monica Potter Sex Scene
Maxim magazine's Bob Ivry once had the privilege of interviewing the love...
Lees on Life
Because he alone was supporting his parents, Los Angeles Dodgers pitcher Billy L...
Innate Wit?
James Whistler was once asked by a female admirer whether he thought genius was ...
Letterman Straight Up
Before the premiere of "Late Night With David Letterman" in 1982, the host was a...
Levity
David Letterman, who - like many comedians - often found the task of producing a...
Led Handshake?
Famed Led Zeppelin manager Peter Grant once introduced himself to Bob Dylan at a...
Bad Benchley
While attending the premiere of "The Squall" in 1926, Robert Benchley - greatly ...
Watts Riot?
When (in 1896) the poet and critic Theodore Watts added his mother's surname(Dun...
Flight of Fancy
While visiting a fashionable Parisian restaurant one evening, James Whistler end...
Three-Pointer
Antoine Walker, who "never saw a three-pointer he didn't like," was once asked w...
Self-Made Man
One day during his brief stint as a Congressman, Horace Greeley found himself co...
Palmerston
"If I were not a Frenchman," Lord Palmerston was once gallantly told, "I should ...
Famous Last Words
One day Lord Palmerston, aged and ailing, was informed by his physician that he ...
Inferiors
A friend of Dorothy Parker's once endeavored to convince her of the fine quality...
Bowing Out
Eugene O'Neill visited a nightclub only once in his life. During a lull in the f...
Sour Kraut?
One day during World War II, Pablo Picasso was visited by the German Gestapo in ...
Repre$entation
Some time after World War II, when Picasso's paintings were fetching fabulous am...
Hopper & Bennett
The famed Hollywood gossip columnist Hedda Hopper once printed a nasty story abo...
Plato & Diogenes
While visiting Plato's home one day, Diogenes, disgusted by its exquisite and co...
Theory of Relatives
Despite their joint ownership (with Albert and Sam) of Warner Brothers studios, ...
Orient Pearls
While editing the weekly magazine Household Words one day Charles Dickens...
Class Reunion?
In March 1981, president Ronald Reagan was shot in the chest by a would-be assas...
Sober Thought
Winston Churchill, noted for his fondness for drink and fine cigars, had many ru...
Expert Witness
While testifying as an expert witness in a trial one day, Henry Rowland was aske...
Literary Critic
Over lunch one day, A.V. Alexander, the First Lord of the Admiralty, lectured th...
Straight-Up Senior
Cyril Dyson, invited to present the graduation prizes at a private girls' school...
Comic Insult
The stand-up comic Katie Davis, whose material was largely inspired by her husba...
Love Machine?
The graphic depictions of masturbation in Philip Roth's 1969 novel ...
Ham Actor
During a scene in Jane Eyre in which Orson Welles was to be burned to dea...
Tigress
Mrs. Patrick Campbell, famous for creating the role of Eliza Doolittle in George...
Sandman
A young dramatist, eager for Carl Sandburg's opinion, once invited the poet to a...
Home Alone
During his 1991 Christmas TV special, Bob Hope spoke with 11-year old Macaulay C...
Miraculous Performance
One evening Noel Coward and Lady Diana Cooper attended a performance featuring a...
Sin
Returning from church one day, Calvin Coolidge's father asked him on what topic ...
Legal Hell
One day, two cantankerous Massachusetts state senators had an argument which end...
Skinny Dipper?
One summer day President Taft went for a swim in his coastal hometown, Beverly B...
Karat or Stick?
Princess Margaret found Elizabeth Taylor's enormous diamond ring rather offensiv...
Laurette Taylor
Attending a party after a poorly-attended performance one evening, Laurette Tayl...
Experience
In the early 1930s, Beatrice Campbell went to Hollywood to pursue a career in fi...
Crank Calls
"After I took office as mayor," Bert May (of the Kentucky League of Cities) once...
Diplomacy
Valentine Dale was once offered a post in Flanders by Queen Elizabeth, who expla...
Family Fued
JFK, Jr. once ran a reproachful letter from the editor in George (his sho...
War Effort
When America entered World War I in 1917, Columbia University president Nicholas...
Heckler
Irked by the constant interruptions of a noisome heckler one day, A. E. Smith pa...
Boo Hiss
One evening, Oskar Blumenthal and the critic Ludwig Sternaux attended the debut ...
Vice Versa
One New Years Eve, Joan Collins split up with boyfriend Arthur Loew, Jr. "You're...
Bye-Sexual?
Gore Vidal was once asked whether his first sexual experience had been with a ma...
Mick's Hair
In 1963, David Bowie saw the Rolling Stones open for Little Richard at the Brixt...
Pregnant Pause?
The classical Greek scholar John Mahaffy once found himself embroiled in a femin...
Groucho Marx: Bath and Sun ...
"Years ago, I decided to join a beach club on Long Island and we drove out to a ...
Memorable Meeting
An inebriated man once stumbled up to Groucho Marx, slapped him on the back, and...
Two Bits
Having attended a dinner party at which Harpo Marx (who often pretended to be du...
Patent Disgust?
Mrs. Horace Greeley, encountering Margaret Fuller in the street one day, happene...
Pothole Ahead?
Michael Pakenham once met a breathtakingly beautiful woman at a psychic/New Age ...
Sage Advice
Henry Fonda was once asked the single most important thing a young actor must kn...
Drug Proof My Ass
Although Arnold Schwarzenegger downplayed his drug use over the years, he was ap...
Voltaire of Discontent
After his expulsion from a seminary, Casanova wandered around Europe meeting lum...
Planes, Trains, and Automob...
While traveling on a train one day, Sir Thomas Beecham was joined in his non-smo...
Hermann Goering Apology
While shuffling along a crowded railroad platform in Rome one day, Hermann Goeri...
Brigitte Bardot: Best Day
During an interview one day Brigitte Bardot was asked to name the best day of he...
Guess?
One day Arnold Schwarzenegger passed a heavy woman and noticed that she was wear...
To a Schweiger...
Hungarian author and playwright Ferenc Molnar was once pestered for a loan by a ...
Horatio, Hornblower?
Hubert Humphrey was the Democratic vice-presidential candidate in the 1964 presi...
Resident Alien
Patrick Stewart retained his British citizenship while living in America. His of...
Heckler Heckled
Stand-up comedian Barry Crimmins was once heckled by an angry audience member. "...
Timeless Question
"A man whom we had never seen before was wished on us for luncheon one day... He...
Pas de Deux
After the debut performance of Billy Rose's "The Seven Lively Arts" on Broadway,...
Trouble in the Air?
One day while walking with Beethoven, Goethe expressed his annoyance at the ince...
Drinkin' Lincoln?
Abraham Lincoln's political nemesis, Stephen Douglas, attempting to discredit hi...
Watch This!
While visiting a speakeasy one day, Robert Benchley and Dorothy Parker were show...
Coffee Lover
Voltaire, who drank copious amounts of coffee throughout his life, was once warn...
Catholic Communist
One day while visiting Soviet-dominated Warsaw in 1956, Elisabeth was assigned a...
Are You John Erskine?
One day the president of the University of Tennessee at Chattanooga went to the ...
General Wolfe
One of James Wolfe's fellow commanders, perhaps irked by his aggressive manner, ...
Punishment for Bigamy
British prime minister John Russell was once asked his opinion vis-a-vis the pro...
Gasbag
While taunting Gordon Hewart one day about his sizable girth, F. E. Smith asked ...
Going Down?
Shortly after the creation of the Actors' Equity Association (in 1913), George M...
Irons in the Fire
After her first manuscript was rejected by several publishing houses, Elinor Gly...
Pshaw?
One evening, a young George Bernard Shaw met the celebrated Oscar Wilde at the L...
Happy Marriage?
After the death of her husband (Sir Lewis Casson), Sybil Thorndike was often ask...
Augean Stables
Morris Cohen was once approached by a student at the end of his introductory phi...
Bottomley
In 1922, after years of fraud and evading the law, Horatio Bottomley was finally...
Immortal Words
Woody Allen was once asked whether he liked the idea of living on on the silver ...
Stanley "H" Kaplan
"In [SAT/LSAT prep company founder Stanley H. Kaplan] Stanley Kaplan's sophomore...
Dueling Violins
In 1917, the sixteen-year-old violin prodigy Jascha Heifetz made his American de...
Fritz Kreisler
The noted violinist Fritz Kreisler was once asked by a society hostess how much ...
Aprilflower?
Comedian Will Rogers was once asked whether his ancestors had come over on the M...
Pedestrian Odor
Queen Victoria, watching a company of perspiring volunteers filing past at a mil...
Any News?
New York Tribune founder Horace Greeley, who insisted that the word "news...
Merde
One evening, Erik Satie attended the debut performance of Debussy's "La Mer" (th...
?
One day Victor Hugo, wondering what his publishers thought of his manuscript dra...
Causmology?
Ronald Knox once found himself embroiled in a theological argument with the scie...
Famous Last Words?
Walter Matthau was once asked whether he resented his wife having the last word....
Tasty Reply?
In Hannibal's notorious dinner scene, Clarice Starling (played by Juliann...
Conspiracy of Silence
When, following Tennyson's death, the mediocre poet Sir Lewis Morris was not amo...
Yapper
A typically talkative barber once asked King Archelaus how he wished to have his...
Beautiful Words
Dorothy Parker was once asked her opinion of the two most beautiful words in the...
Cheap Lie
While visiting an antique shop one day, William Gladstone encountered an early 1...
Goodness Mae
Mae West was famed for her quick wit and saucy tongue. "Goodness, Mae," a friend...
Blonde Jokes
Dolly Parton's appearance engendered considerable speculation - and not just on ...
Marilyn Monroe: Classic Mar...
Marilyn Monroe was once asked by a journalist what she wore to bed. Her reply? "...
Doctor's Orders
One day Otto Hartleben fell ill and consulted a doctor. After a thorough examina...
Modest Proposal
While walking one day with one of his sister's friends (Utica Welles), Thomas Be...
Time
John Erskine was once asked whether he found it discombobulating to see people g...
Rainy Day?
Shortly after leaving church one Sunday Mark Twain and his friend and fellow wri...
Critic
Oliver Herford was once asked his opinion of Arnold Bennett's work. "Well," he r...
Cosby
After a performance one evening, Bill Cosby was visited backstage by an aide who...
Spit Ball
Baseball legend Stan Musial was once asked for advice on how to hit a spit ball....
Passerby
At a party one evening James Whistler found himself buttonholed by a notorious b...
Haldane
The great geneticist J. B. S. Haldane once found himself embroiled in a philosop...
Edison's Phonograph
One day the famed journalist Henry Morton Stanley - having witnessed a demonstra...
Sexpot?
At their wedding, Dick Haymes (Rita Hayworth's fourth husband) was asked whether...
Minor Hitch
One day on the set of Lifeboat, Alfred Hitchcock had a minor difficulty w...
Question of Taste
One day radio director Tom Carlson found to his dismay that his dog had destroye...
Cream of Ulster
One day during his brief tenure at Campbell College in Belfast, Samuel Beckett w...
Failed Writers
The publisher Robert Giroux once asked T. S. Eliot whether he agreed with the wi...
Little Breeches
Though its author was in fact John Hay, Bret Harte was often given credit for th...
Scoundrels
John Randolph of Roanoke and Henry Clay - deadly rivals - once found themselves ...
NATO Workers
NATO secretary general Joseph Luns was once asked how many people worked at NATO...
Pinckney
Adams's grandiose presidential style contrasted sharply with the simple elegance...
Devilish Insult
While out campaigning one day, John Wilkes was confronted by a nasty voter: "I'd...
PhD
Goerge Kittredge was once asked why, given his immense scholarship, he had never...
Going, Going, Gone
The composer Maria Cherubini once granted an audition to a man with such a power...
Valet Parking
Wilson Mizner once drove to a Hollywood premiere in a dilapidated Ford. Pulling ...
Bourgeois Entertainment?
Dorothy Parker and Somerset Maugham attended a party one evening at which guests...
Pillar of Truth?
At the end of one of Robert Bunsen's courses, an unfamiliar student presented hi...
Gray-Blue
At a party one evening, someone remarked of G. K. Chesterton's brother Cecil tha...
Message
MGM co-founder Samuel Goldwyn was often criticized for producing films with litt...
Rich Reply
During the Civil War, Abraham Lincoln was asked by a certain gentleman for a pas...
Hellion?
Sir Robert Menzies was once interrupted by a heckler while addressing a politica...
Berned?
"A snooty woman of Lord Berners's acquaintance once complained when a head waite...
We
One day a pompous young minister used - in the presence of Edward VII - the roya...
Westinghouse
Although Westinghouse's automatic air brake (patented in 1872) promised a dramat...
Happy Marriage?
Fitzroy Maclean (often said to have been Ian Fleming's model for James Bond) was...
Concorde Crashes
After the crash of Air France flight 4590 in a Paris suburb in 2000 (due to a bl...
Hypothetical Question
Jean Cocteau was once asked what he would take if his house was burning down and...
Unfortunate Client
A young lawyer was once called upon to make his first appearance in a courtroom ...
Nothing but Wind
An American once complained to Marshal Foch about the polite insincerity of his ...
Make-Up Test?
Jennifer Lopez was once asked what she had gotten on her SATs (Scholastic Aptitu...
'Killer' Joke
One day during World War II, Oscar Levant was called in to appear before the dra...
Lobsters
While dining at an expensive restaurant one evening, Georges Feydeau was served ...
Chicken Farmer
Victor Borge - having purchased a chicken farm - was confronted one day by a fri...
Twain's Tie
Returning from a visit with Harriet Beecher Stowe one day, Mark Twain was reprim...
Elm Tree
While visiting a wealthy friend in the country one day, Wolcott Gibbs was shown ...
Barry Sheene
British motorcycling legend Barry Sheene notched up so many high-speed crashes t...
Pissa
The citizens of the town of Gumbinnen once petitioned Frederick William for perm...
Splendid Ass
Someone once tactlessly remarked upon Georg Lichtenberg's enormous ears. "Well, ...
Dry Humor
Lord Beaverbrook's valet often referred to his master as "the Lord." Randolph Ch...
Top Billing?
George Gershwin was not noted for his modesty. His friend and fellow pianist Osc...
Infinite Jest
During Andrew Jackson's first term, his friendship with Peggy Eaton, the attract...
Cato
Cato the Censor was once asked why no statue had ever been erected to commemorat...
Fine Specimen?
Frank Sinatra was once asked about his reputation as a womanizer. "If I had as m...
Comic Timing
Mae West once found herself acting opposite Alison Skipworth. Skipworth, suspect...
Halter or the Pox
While dining one evening with John Wilkes at London's famous Beef Steak Club (in...
Christening
One day a Cunard executive made the mistake of telling George V of his company's...
Pearl of Wisdom
"Mrs. Havemeyer, whose collection of paintings is today the pride of New York's ...
MacBeth
While contemplating a possible revival of "Macbeth" on Broadway, Alexander Wooll...
Snubbed
Some time after the restoration of Napoleon III, Lady Blessington was forced by ...
Unprincipled Playwright
Sheridan, whose financial affairs were in perpetual turmoil, was once beseeched ...
Gastronome
The famed French gastronome Anthelme Brillat-Savarin was once asked whether he p...
Embarrassing Question
Carol Channing, as part of a nightclub act, often encouraged audience members to...
Posh
While examining the menu at a posh New York restaurant one evening, Chico Marx t...
Worm Saloon
Shortly after the appearance of Independent Worm Saloon, Butthole Surfers...
Bronko
Even among other players, Bronko Nagurski was famed for his incredible toughness...
Just Desserts
While riding in a carriage one day, Lord Norbury and John Parsons (another Irish...
Touche
Like the terrorist attacks on September 11th, 2001, the Kennedy assassination in...
Silver Lining
Johannes Brahms once found himself cornered by a group of talkative female admir...
Always Axl
One day in 1988, Guns 'n' Roses frontman Axl Rose, shocked by his worsening repu...
Prodigal Son
Lord Brougham was dismayed one day to learn that his eldest son was having an af...
Work Ethic
Thomas Jefferson was once asked whether he believed in luck. "I'm a great believ...
Russian Winter
During a particularly cold spell one winter, the famous Russian chess player Sav...
Dim Starr?
After joining the Beatles, Ringo Starr was regarded by his bandmates as a "faith...
Franklin Delano Roosevelt
The 1936 presidential election pitted Franklin Delano Roosevelt against Alfred L...
Skyscraper
While British Prime Minister A. J. Balfour was visiting America one year, his ho...
Hillary Clinton & David Let...
In January 2000, Hillary Clinton made a guest appearance on "The Late Show with ...
Churchill's Mustache
While serving as a young subaltern, Winston Churchill (who then sported a trim m...
Definition of a Gentleman
"At dinner one evening in Belgium, Montgomery asked us for our definition of a g...
Handicap
"Gross in appetite and appearance, with nimble wit concealed beneath buffoon's e...
Great Gatsby
F. Scott Fitzgerald's original title for The Great Gatsby was ...
Dear Soul
The great pianist Ignace Jan Paderewski was once introduced to a polo player wit...
Swelled Head
Sir Herbert Beerbohm Tree once reproached a young actor for his arrogant manner....
Eton-Harrow
"When Stanley Baldwin - who went to Harrow - was Prime Minister, his Home Secret...
Gaulling Suggestion?
One day in the 1950s, Jacques Soustelle, governor-general of Algeria between 195...
Fed Chairman
During Alan Greenspan's tenure as Federal Reserve Board chairman, market-watcher...
Two-Faced Abe?
Abraham Lincoln was once accused of being two-faced. "If I were two-faced," he r...
Connery's Zipper
Sean Connery once made a memorable talk show appearance - with his fly inadverta...
American Legend
In 1974, John Wayne agreed, in exchange for publicity for one of his films, to s...
Pointed Question?
Christopher Columbus once attended an elaborate banquet, held in his honor by th...
Urgent Telegram
While working in the Foreign Office Paul Gore-Booth once received an urgent tele...
Classic Coward
Raymond Massey: "Hannen Swaffer, a critic and theatre writer on the ...
GMT
The great mathematician and physicist Paul Dirac once attended a meeting in an a...
Arrogant Pauli
As a teenager, Wolfgang Pauli wrote an article on relativity (for a scientific e...
Chi Son?
During a rehearsal one day, Puccini was dismayed to find Enrico Caruso dragging ...
Age and Wisdom
During Greer Garson's glory days, Joe Ruttenberg was her favorite cameraman at M...
Reagan Wit
"Mr. President," Ronald Reagan was asked during a press conference one day, "in ...
Seventeen Bras
One day in 2003, a Canadian Guinness World record-holder appeared on the "Tonigh...
Michael Douglas & Catherine...
"We were at his house in Spain," Catherine Zeta-Jones recalled of her early cour...
"Spaceman"
Famed Boston Red Sox pitcher Bill "Spaceman" Lee was once asked whether he prefe...
Angelina Jolie & Billy Bob ...
Shortly after breaking up with Billy Bob Thornton, Rolling Stone's Chris ...
Miss Manners & High-Heeled ...
Judith Martin, famed for her popular syndicated "Miss Manners" column, once rece...
Howie Mandel: Howie's Hair
While guest hosting "Live with Regis and Kelly" with Kelly Ripa one day, the com...
Les Dawson's Mother-in-Law
Like many men, Les Dawson did not see eye to eye with his mother-in-law. "The wi...
One Minute With Beverly Mic...
Like every woman, Beverly Mickins was often amused by the lines men used to try ...
Julie Walters & Grant Roffe...
Julie Walters (perhaps best known for her role as Mrs Weasley in Christopher Col...
Arnold Palmer & Frank Sinatra
Arnold Palmer once shot a friendly round with Frank Sinatra. "How you like my ga...
Liberace's Rings
The legendary pianist Liberace was famed for his flamboyant outfits and the garg...
Hugh Grant: Sex Scandal
"On June 27th, 1995, Hugh Grant was arrested by the LAPD 'on suspicion of lewd c...
Mickey Spillane: Ex-Wife
While interviewing Mickey Spillane for a story one day, Vanity Fair's Cli...
Michael O'Donoghue: Elvis i...
"I've seen this attributed to John Lennon," director John Landis once recalled, ...
Keith Olbermann: ESPN
During contract negotiations in April 1997, ESPN's Sport Center host Keit...
Natalie Portman: The Necklace
During the production of Closer (2004), Natalie Portman gave co-star Juli...
Matt LeBlanc: Making Babies
During an appearance on the "Tonight Show" in 2004, Matt LeBlanc announced that ...
Michael Moore & Jay Leno: U...
During an appearance on the "Tonight Show" in 2004, Michael Moore was asked abou...
Hugh Hefner: Meeting Barbi
One evening on the set of "Playboy After Dark," Hugh Hefner met a beautiful woma...
Patrick Roy: Patrick Roo-aw
Vancouver Canucks coach Marc Crawford was once asked how long French-Canadian go...
Robert Mitchum: Prison Life
In 1948, Robert Mitchum was arrested for marijuana possession and spent several ...
Rahm Emanuel: Congress on t...
During one of his regular "Congress on the Corner" sessions, Rahm Emanuel handed...
Napoleon Bonaparte & Counte...
"[After his second conquest of Milan from the Austrians] Napoleon arranged a gra...
Dorothy Parker: Bored
Dorothy Parker did not suffer boredom, or bores, gladly. ("He's the type of man,...
Terry Broadshaw Construction
During an appearance on the "Tonight Show" one evening, Terry Bradshaw announced...
Redd Foxx: Qualifications
"Sanford and Son" star Redd Foxx, a stickler for perfection, often challenged th...
Will Rogers: Patriotic Heckler
"Will Rogers was delivering one of his famous topical monologues in the great Zi...
Woodrow Wilson: Esteem for ...
Senator William Borah was among President Woodrow Wilson's fiercest rivals durin...
A Horse! A Horse!
One evening the great tragedian Barry Sullivan was performing in "Richard III" i...
Robert Novak: Instant Dislike
Robert Novak, best known for his role on CNN's Crossfire (and in the Karl...
James Fisk: Robber Barrons
In 1869, the railroad financier and speculator James Fisk joined forces with fel...
Diogenes: Little Thief
Diogenes once observed a thief (who had stolen a silver cup from the treasury) b...
Winston Churchill: Imaginar...
Winston Churchill was once introduced before a speech with a good-natured refere...
Ben Disraeli and the Temple...
In 1835, the Irish Roman Catholic leader Daniel O'Connell attacked Benjamin Disr...
If the Shoe Fits...
Julius III once engaged a shoemaker to fashion special papal slippers. When they...
Fishy Fairy Tale
A visitor to the royal home at Balmoral, admiring a portrait of the royal childr...
Gift of the Gab (long)
"NYPD Blue" viewers were once treated to a remarkable shower scene showing
Det...
Happy Birthday
The B-52s' Fred Schneider was once asked to name his favorite song. "Happy Birth...
Harpsichord
During a rehearsal of his opera Flavio one day, Handel, accompanying the ...
Christ of the Andes
In March 1904, a large statue of Jesus Christ was erected in the Uspallata Pass ...
Belley-Roller
The famed gastronome Anthelme Brillat-Savarin was once asked where he had been b...
Fishy Explanation
Ernie Byfield, who ran Chicago's legendary Pump Room, was once asked why real ca...
Airport Disturbance
The novelist Irwin Shaw once found himself waiting for a flight to Europe in an ...
ICU?
Los Angeles Times sports writer Jim Murray was once greeted by an old fri...
What's in a Name?
Tennessee Williams and Sylvia Miles (one of his leading ladies) were strolling t...
Buddha
Gautama Buddha's preaching was interrupted one day by a man unleashing a flurry ...
George S. Kaufman: Golden P...
A promoter once praised the productivity of a gold mine with an eye on persuadin...
Superstar Contract
After batting just .187 in 86 games with the Toronto Blue Jays in 1981, Danny Ai...
50-50
Despite having bet on Richard Nixon in the 1968 presidential election, Ann Lande...
Mad Drinker?
One evening a friend, amazed that Sir Hercules Langrishe had allegedly managed t...
Human Understanding?
Shortly before his death, David Hume fell into conversation with a friend, who l...
Billy Connolly - Heckler
During a performance one evening, comedian Billy Connolly was interrupted by an ...
Bad Protocall?
Caninius Revilus had the distinction of serving as consul for a single day. When...
Avant Garde Jean-Luc Godard
Jean-Luc Godard once attended a film symposium at which a fellow filmmaker (Geor...
Bright Remark
John Bright was once buttonholed by one of Benjamin Disraeli's admirers bent on ...
Screw Turner?
James Whistler was once invited to offer his opinion of whether a certain painti...
Wilson Mizner: Leather Upper
While playing a round of poker with Wilson Mizner one evening, a friend of the w...
Garbage State?
Jodi Lyn O'Keefe once took issue with stereotypes about her home state (New Jers...
Morgan
In a burst of patriotism, J. P. Morgan once declared, "America is good enough fo...
Wealthy Woman
Although most of Cornelia's children died young, Tiberius and Gaius both grew to...
Future Lawyer?
One day the young Daniel Webster, instructed to mow a field on his father's farm...
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